3 THINGS RELATIONSHIP COACHES WON’T TELL YOU
Relationship coaching can be a transformative experience, offering invaluable insights into personal growth, communication, and intimacy.
But there are also some misconceptions and myths that need to be addressed head on.
As a seasoned sex and relationship coach, I've noticed a few key beliefs or concepts that are seldom discussed openly. So today we’re pulling back the curtain and looking at some truths that can profoundly impact your journey in understanding and improving your relationships.
Relationship coaches rarely admit that…
Perfect relationships don’t exist — and that’s okay.
One of the biggest myths in relationship coaching is the idea of a perfect relationship.
Coaches often highlight success stories and breakthroughs, leaving many to chase an unrealistic standard of perpetual harmony and passion.
The truth is, even the healthiest relationships face conflicts and challenges. Instead of pursuing a “perfect” relationship, a more realistic goal is striving for a relationship that is:
Flexible
Resilient
Fulfilling
Strong relationships persevere even in the face of adversity. If you wait for things to be perfect, you’ll be chasing an unrealistic expectation that you’ll never find.
Coaches won’t usually tell you that conflict is not just normal, it’s necessary for growth.
Learning to navigate disagreements and misunderstandings teaches partners valuable skills like empathy, compromise, and patience.
The most effective relationship coaches know that…
The change starts with YOU.
A common misconception about relationship coaching is that the coach will fix all the issues.
In reality, the effectiveness of coaching hinges largely on the client's willingness to engage in self-reflection and change.
Coaches can guide, suggest, and support, but they cannot change your relationship for you.
It’s essential to enter coaching with the mindset of being an active participant in your growth.
This means being prepared to challenge your beliefs, confront your fears, and sometimes make uncomfortable changes. It’s a process that's often more about personal transformation than about changing your partner or letting your coach “fix” you.
Smart relationships coaches know that…
There’s no “one size fits all” approach.
Every relationship is unique, and what works for one couple may not work for another.
Relationship coaches often have a toolbox of strategies, from communication exercises to intimacy-building activities, yet there’s seldom discussion about the mismatch between a method and a couple’s specific needs.
The secret here is customization. A skilled coach adjusts their tools and approach to fit the unique dynamic of each relationship.
This means that sometimes common, widely accepted advice just may not be the best solution for you.
Coaches understand this, but often their marketing suggests otherwise, promising universal solutions to complex, individual problems.
Find a coach who is willing to work with you and create customized solutions tailored to your relationship and needs!
What’s next?
The goal isn’t to create a perfect relationship. You want to foster one that thrives on authenticity, understanding, and continuous growth.
As you navigate the world of relationship coaching, keep the 3 truths I shared today in mind, and use them to guide your expectations and efforts.
When you’re ready to work with a relationship coach who doesn’t shy away from the truth, but instead embraces it to help you make improvements and changes in yourself and your relationships, you can check out my website. d misunderstandings teaches partners valuable skills like empathy, compromise, and patience.