HOW CAN YOU GET RID OF JEALOUSY? THE KEY TO BREAKING FREE

Jealousy, often dubbed the "green-eyed monster," can significantly undermine the health and happiness of a relationship. 

Jealousy usually includes feelings of insecurity, anxiety, and fear of loss, and it will poison interactions between partners, leading to conflict and distress. There’s no room for jealousy in a healthy relationship, but many of us will struggle with jealousy at some point. 

Today we’re going to explore the toxic effects of jealousy, provide practical steps for overcoming personal jealousy, and offer advice on handling a jealous partner.

The Toxic Impact of Jealousy on Relationships

 Many people believe that jealousy is just a “normal” part of any relationship, but the truth is that nothing will ruin a relationship faster. Jealousy isn’t just an inconvenience – it’s a relationship ruiner. 

Jealousy does the most damage by undermining trust. It erodes the foundation of any relationship – trust – and creates a cycle of suspicion and doubt.

Another toxic effect of jealousy is a lack of growth. Healthy, strong relationships require personal and relational growth, but when one partner (or both partners) is jealous, a couple becomes dependent and fears independence.

Jealousy also leads directly to conflict. Jealous behaviors provoke arguments and can lead to controlling or manipulative actions that ultimately destroy a relationship. 

How Can You Get Rid of Jealousy?

There are several strategies I use to help my clients recognize, manage, and overcome their own jealousy or their partner’s jealousy within a relationship.

You should always start with self-reflection. This practice will help you get in tune with your feelings and identify the root cause(s) of your jealousy. Things like insecurity, past traumas, and unmet needs can often cause jealousy. If you’re dealing with a jealous partner – self-reflection can help you identify ways your behavior, actions, and beliefs are contributing to their jealousy. 

Open communication is one of the best antidotes to jealousy. If you can tell your partner how you feel in a calm, honest manner (without blaming them), you’ll be amazed at how much better you feel.

If your jealousy stems from self-doubt or insecurity, taking part in activities that build your self-esteem can really help. Do more of the things that boost your confidence and give you a sense of self-worth outside your relationship. 

If you want to get rid of jealousy, you must accept that some level of attention from outside your partnership is normal and not a threat. Setting realistic expectations can help you avoid feeling jealous in the first place. 

The final strategy for getting rid of jealousy? Practicing trust. When you actively work to trust your partner and resist the urge to control their actions or snoop through their cell phone, you’ll keep your relationship free of jealousy.

Dealing with a Jealous Partner

If you’ve done your own work and are confident that you’re not struggling with jealousy – but your partner is – there are some ways you can actively participate in helping them overcome their own jealous feelings. Remember, you can’t make anyone feel a certain way. But you can support them and make it easier to get rid of jealous feelings. 

Start by encouraging open dialogue. Keep your calm and invite your partner to express their feelings. If they can tell you what triggers their jealousy, you can work together to avoid those triggers or at least acknowledge them when they pop up. 

Reassure your partner that you are committed to them. It’s not your job to convince your partner you’re there for them, but you can make it easier for them to accept. Sometimes a simple, “I’m not leaving you” or “I love you even when…” can reassure them of your affection and alleviate their fears. 

One key to dealing with a jealous partner is setting healthy boundaries. Clearly define what behaviors are acceptable and which are not, ensuring that you do not enable jealous behavior. 

If things get too challenging or feel out of control, seek professional help. When jealousy is deeply rooted and affecting daily life, you may need help from a therapist or counselor.

Need Help Getting Rid of Jealousy?

While jealousy is a common and natural emotion, it can become destructive if left unchecked. By understanding the underlying causes of jealousy and actively working on security – in your own feelings and within your relationship –  you can mitigate the effects of jealousy and foster a healthier, more trusting relationship. 

Dealing with jealousy, whether your own or your partner's, requires patience, empathy, and often, professional guidance. The journey to breaking free from jealousy offers a valuable opportunity for personal growth and strengthening your relationship.

If you need professional support, I would love to chat with you about how I can help you build your self-confidence and overcome jealousy in your relationship.

If you’d like professional support in navigating a jealous relationship – let’s talk about how I can help you.